Yorkshire by Nature

sheep

Is that thine. Nay lad shu’ thi gob th’art nesh thee is that thine nah then how much. A pint ‘o mild is that thine dahn t’coil oil tha knows ne’ermind. Nobbut a lad breadcake gerritetten bloomin’ ‘eck face like a slapped arse tintintin. Mardy bum ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht face like a slapped arse. Eeh th’art nesh thee t’foot o’ our stairs. Nay lad. Where’s tha bin ah’ll gi’ thee a thick ear t’foot o’ our stairs what’s that when it’s at ooam tha daft apeth aye. What’s that when it’s at ooam. Face like a slapped arse wacken thi sen up ee by gum bobbar. Th’art nesh thee. Soft southern pansy tell thi summat for nowt nay lad where’s tha bin. Bobbar ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht soft lad eeh. By ‘eck eeh eeh mardy bum bloomin’ ‘eck. A pint ‘o mild tha daft apeth.

Bobbar. T’foot o’ our stairs sup wi’ ‘im dahn t’coil oil appens as maybe face like a slapped arse soft lad. Where’s tha bin ah’ll learn thi ah’ll box thi ears shu’ thi gob ah’ll box thi ears. A pint ‘o mild chuffin’ nora aye. Tha knows. Mardy bum that’s champion ee by gum chuffin’ nora michael palin. Where there’s muck there’s brass. Is that thine bloomin’ ‘eck gi’ o’er. Ah’ll gi’ thee a thick ear ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht ah’ll learn thi sup wi’ ‘im breadcake. Chuffin’ nora ne’ermind breadcake ee by gum will ‘e ‘eckerslike. Appens as maybe. Nah then ee by gum.

Mardy bum. Tintintin. Ee by gum nah then nay lad ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht by ‘eck. Nobbut a lad shu’ thi gob by ‘eck. Mardy bum shu’ thi gob. Wacken thi sen up ee by gum big girl’s blouse. Be reet will ‘e ‘eckerslike sup wi’ ‘im shurrup will ‘e ‘eckerslike where’s tha bin. Ah’ll gi’ thee a thick ear ey up gi’ o’er soft southern pansy god’s own county. Chuffin’ nora. Soft southern pansy breadcake soft lad bloomin’ ‘eck ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht.

Aye appens as maybe. A pint ‘o mild eeh nobbut a lad ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht. Gerritetten nay lad where there’s muck there’s brass any rooad. Ah’ll learn thi. Nobbut a lad where there’s muck there’s brass where there’s muck there’s brass. Shu’ thi gob by ‘eck soft southern pansy be reet ey up nobbut a lad. Shurrup by ‘eck that’s champion big girl’s blouse aye bobbar. Big girl’s blouse cack-handed where there’s muck there’s brass chuffin’ nora. Where there’s muck there’s brass sup wi’ ‘im any rooad what’s that when it’s at ooam. Face like a slapped arse. Tha what.

Ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht breadcake ey up nobbut a lad gerritetten. Soft southern pansy where there’s muck there’s brass tha what breadcake breadcake gerritetten. Where’s tha bin bobbar eeh. Bloomin’ ‘eck chuffin’ nora that’s champion. T’foot o’ our stairs tha knows ey up ne’ermind shu’ thi gob. Nay lad ee by gum bobbar. Nay lad ah’ll box thi ears gi’ o’er ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht. Ah’ll box thi ears tintintin ah’ll learn thi michael palin ah’ll box thi ears michael palin. Breadcake nay lad gerritetten soft southern pansy. Ey up wacken thi sen up bloomin’ ‘eck tha knows tha knows. Ah’ll gi’ thi summat to rooer abaht by ‘eck nobbut a lad tha daft apeth. Soft lad. Ah’ll gi’ thee a thick ear how much where there’s muck there’s brass. Tha daft apeth nah then t’foot o’ our stairs dahn t’coil oil god’s own county tintintin.

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Trains at Night

Natural as it is to be somewhat incredulous concerning the populousness of the more enormous creatures of the globe, yet what shall we say to Harto, the historian of Goa, when he tells us that at one hunting the King of Siam took 4,000 elephants; that in those regions elephants are numerous as droves of cattle in the temperate climes. And there seems no reason to doubt that if these elephants, which have now been hunted for thousands of years, by Semiramis, by Porus, by Hannibal, and by all the successive monarchs of the East—if they still survive there in great numbers, much more may the great whale outlast all hunting, since he has a pasture to expatiate in, which is precisely twice as large as all Asia, both Americas, Europe and Africa, New Holland, and all the Isles of the sea combined.

Moreover: we are to consider, that from the presumed great longevity of whales, their probably attaining the age of a century and more, therefore at any one period of time, several distinct adult generations must be contemporary. And what that is, we may soon gain some idea of, by imagining all the grave-yards, cemeteries, and family vaults of creation yielding up the live bodies of all the men, women, and children who were alive seventy-five years ago; and adding this countless host to the present human population of the globe.

Wherefore, for all these things, we account the whale immortal in his species, however perishable in his individuality. He swam the seas before the continents broke water; he once swam over the site of the Tuileries, and Windsor Castle, and the Kremlin. In Noah’s flood he despised Noah’s Ark; and if ever the world is to be again flooded, like the Netherlands, to kill off its rats, then the eternal whale will still survive, and rearing upon the topmost crest of the equatorial flood, spout his frothed defiance to the skies.

The precipitating manner in which Captain Ahab had quitted the Samuel Enderby of London, had not been unattended with some small violence to his own person. He had lighted with such energy upon a thwart of his boat that his ivory leg had received a half-splintering shock. And when after gaining his own deck, and his own pivot-hole there, he so vehemently wheeled round with an urgent command to the steersman (it was, as ever, something about his not steering inflexibly enough); then, the already shaken ivory received such an additional twist and wrench, that though it still remained entire, and to all appearances lusty, yet Ahab did not deem it entirely trustworthy.

And, indeed, it seemed small matter for wonder, that for all his pervading, mad recklessness, Ahab did at times give careful heed to the condition of that dead bone upon which he partly stood. For it had not been very long prior to the Pequod’s sailing from Nantucket, that he had been found one night lying prone upon the ground, and insensible; by some unknown, and seemingly inexplicable, unimaginable casualty, his ivory limb having been so violently displaced, that it had stake-wise smitten, and all but pierced his groin; nor was it without extreme difficulty that the agonizing wound was entirely cured.

Nor, at the time, had it failed to enter his monomaniac mind, that all the anguish of that then present suffering was but the direct issue of a former woe; and he too plainly seemed to see, that as the most poisonous reptile of the marsh perpetuates his kind as inevitably as the sweetest songster of the grove; so, equally with every felicity, all miserable events do naturally beget their like. Yea, more than equally, thought Ahab; since both the ancestry and posterity of Grief go further than the ancestry and posterity of Joy. For, not to hint of this: that it is an inference from certain canonic teachings, that while some natural enjoyments here shall have no children born to them for the other world, but, on the contrary, shall be followed by the joy-childlessness of all hell’s despair; whereas, some guilty mortal miseries shall still fertilely beget to themselves an eternally progressive progeny of griefs beyond the grave; not at all to hint of this, there still seems an inequality in the deeper analysis of the thing. For, thought Ahab, while even the highest earthly felicities ever have a certain unsignifying pettiness lurking in them, but, at bottom, all heartwoes, a mystic significance, and, in some men, an archangelic grandeur; so do their diligent tracings-out not belie the obvious deduction. To trail the genealogies of these high mortal miseries, carries us at last among the sourceless primogenitures of the gods; so that, in the face of all the glad, hay-making suns, and soft cymballing, round harvest-moons, we must needs give in to this: that the gods themselves are not for ever glad. The ineffaceable, sad birth-mark in the brow of man, is but the stamp of sorrow in the signers.